ARE YOU A TAKER OR A GIVER?
Last week I had a great “aha” moment thanks to a beautiful human being that the universe kindly put in my path. His name is Gary Mahler, (garymahler.com) and in our first conversation he managed to untangle a contradictory dialogue I have been carrying for a while.
Wayne Dyer used to say, “when you seek happiness for yourself, happiness will elude you. When you seek happiness for others, you will find it in yourself” and boy, this phrase has had a mind-blowing, life-changing impact on my life.
I started to apply this concept to every aspect of my life, and a magical shift started to happen.
I realised that there are two kinds of people in this world: the takers, who are primarily just looking out for themselves, and the givers, who are more concerned with the greater good of the planet.
There is a joke about a man who fell into a river and didn’t know how to swim. A group of people tried to save him by asking for his hand... “give me your hand” they shouted. But the man would not give his hand. Finally someone said “take my hand” and the man reached out and took his hand.
When I realised that in the past I have been more of a taker than a giver, I not only felt embarrassed, but it also explained my existential struggle: a constant feeling that I was living a shallow, low energy, lacking in meaning and with a lack of self belief life.
Our brain is constantly “downloading” programs about GETTING (or accumulating) things in life. GET good marks at school. GET a job. GET married. GET A LIFE! This false belief that accumulating the bigger, the better or the most expensive brings satisfaction or fulfillment, is the source of our deepest problem.
How often do you think about what you’ve gained in your life? Is it really meaningful? Does it make you happy? Would you do it again in the same way if you had the choice or would you change your choices for things you feel more passionate about?
When I started to live a life focused on giving, the best version of myself started to manifest. This small shift has been PARAMOUNT!
As a result, I LOVE MY LIFE! I love my job and serving my clients. I just want to shout about how living an authentic life, being of service to others and in alignment with who I am, has made such a difference.
Why? Because by giving and serving, I am naturally grounded and centred with myself. And that is the most powerful feeling I ever experienced.
Coming back to Gary, this experience summarises everything I have shared in this post. He is one of the highest paid coaches in the world yet when I shared with him that I couldn’t afford his fees at the moment, he said, “don’t worry, I’m curious about you and I would like to know more”. Within minutes of meeting, our conversation was at the deepest of levels and he observed things about my thought habits which have made a fundamental shift in how I offer my services. Since then, we have continued to share and dialogue, and all I feel is the most tremendous gratitude.
If like me, you want to start living a life with meaning, start giving the best you have to offer to this world. Become a giver and the universe will pay you back thousand fold!
Here's to a life of abundance!
Nico
