Recently someone sent me a message on Facebook asking: What is your greatest source of pain? This can be where you find your purpose in helping others.
I have to confess that his question/comment hit a nerve. I suddenly realised that the greatest source of my pain, and what my coaching is based on, is FEAR.
I’m not referring to external fears that stem from a life-threatening situation, a fear of heights, water or snakes and spiders. The fear I’m referring to is internal fear. For example, a fear of public speaking or saying what you really think, or approaching a girl or guy to say “hey, I like you”.
I call this social fear, and it is a kind of fear that conditions us to behave in a limiting way, based on what society might think or say.
Social fear isn’t all bad, because it is what helps us grow and that, ultimately, is a good thing. So I am not giving fear a negative connotation.
But fear is a problem when we allow it to paralyse us, preventing us from moving forward. That’s when and how we create our own Mexican Wall (as discussed in my last blog) because we think that a wall will protect us from external threats.
However I can guarantee you one thing. You are who you are, and you have what you have, and you do what you do, in direct proportion to how much you allow your fears to influence your life.
If you want to have a ‘light bulb’ moment, read that last sentence again and give it some thought. What fears are stopping you from living the life you want to live? And how did this happen?
I say WAKE UP and take action! Listen to your inner voice yelling DON’T GIVE UP, YOU ARE MEANT FOR GREATNESS!
Running away from your fears won’t solve anything. Actually it will strengthen them. Fears are like a shadow: they will follow you forever, unless you turn around and face them head on. There is no other way or shortcuts. It’s ironic I know, as fear makes you want to run in the opposite direction.
Be grateful for your fears and make them your greatest motivator, because they are pointing you in the right direction: on the other side of fear is your breakthrough.
So coming back to the the original question... how do I find purpose in helping others? By helping people to overcome their fears so they can be, have or do whatever they set their minds to.
I would be interested in your thoughts. If you are fearless, leave a comment below. If you feel that you need a kick in your butt to help you face your fears, contact me. I would love to help.