I believe that the ultimate goal to strive for in life is happiness.
I also believe that one of the main reason why we struggle to find happiness is due to a fear of what people might think of us.
The problem is that some of this fear-conditioning is so rooted in our being that we have learnt to coexist with it without noticing that the decisions we make are constantly being shaped by the fear.
The process goes something like this: the more you care about what other people think, the more power you give away. The more power you give away, the less ‘you’ you are. The less ‘you’ you are, the more like ‘others’ you become. The more like others you become, the further away you are from your centre. The further away you are from your centre, the less happiness, meaningfulness and love you will experience.
A life based on the fear of what others might think will influence you by making you…
feel like you can’t speak freely
feel emotionally and spiritually weak
lie, and behave like a hypocrite
lack self-awareness, and an ability to see the truth of things
spend your time hoping that the future will be better than the present - without doing anything to make that happen.
You are in this world for a reason, but how can you (and the world) know who you truly are if you are not yourself? If your life is limited by your self-belief (and there will always be a new one to conquer) how can you shine as the true being that you are?
Here is the interesting part… it’s not what people will think about you that is the true problem. It’s what you think about yourself that limits your own life.
It’s your internal dialogue that kills your belief in yourself and therefore any chance of growth and expansion as a human being. For example… I’m not good enough. I’m not attractive enough. I’m not smart enough. I’m too selfish. I hate my body. I hate my job. I hate my life, I don’t know…
If you are repeating these thoughts over and over again, how can you ever move forward freely and happily in life? The truth is that you won’t and you never will, unless you change your internal dialogue and your limiting beliefs.
Wayne Dyer used to say… “The only limits that you have are the limits that you believe”.
Sound familiar? So what can you do?
Face your limiting beliefs. Ignore the voice that worries what others will think. Find a coach who can help you to identify when a fear of what others will think is holding you back. There is no shortcut or easy way to break through (at least that I have learnt so far). You just need to find the courage to recognise when it is fear that is stopping you. That’s it. Otherwise, you will forever be prevented from taking steps in the direction you are truly meant to go.
But there is a flip side to the story. As you face your fears and limiting beliefs (or even better ignore them), you will conquer them. You know I’m right, because deep inside you, you know that there is a flame that needs to become a bonfire.
Now imagine a life where you have the confidence to do, say or have whatever you want in life. A confidence that will allow you to break free from every thought that is limiting you or holding you back. A confidence that means you don’t care what the rest of the world will think or say.
Imagine being fearless, with your confidence at it’s peak. Would you be living the life you are living? No, right? I’m sure that you would make some changes.
What would you do differently? Write a fearless list of all the things that you really want to start happening in your life and follow my 4-step program to make them happen.
Here is the good news: however your mind has been conditioned, it can be unconditioned. Since I started challenging my limiting beliefs and tuned in with what is really meaningful for me (without worrying so much about what society might think or say), I have tuned into how amazing life is.
Being freed of social conditioning and self-criticism is the most powerful and electrifying feeling I ever experienced in my life.
Here's to a life of power!